Going through the motions

I'm still eating. 

Proof:

I basically copied this recipe, except I measured everything to taste and eliminated the red pepper. 

Creamy and delicious. 

Because I feel bad for not posting about anything food-related in so long...

This is a bit of an atypical meal for me-- leftover buffalo chicken chili mixed with whole wheat pasta and topped with cheddar cheese. It tasted super unhealthy, and I think maybe it was. It was one of my last meals in my old apartment (aka like 3 weeks ago) and I honestly forget what I put in it, but this recipe seems similar. 

In other news, Schuy hates running in the heat and has been downright depressed about it. Thank god Nate is coming to take him back to Ithaca for the next 6 weeks before he starts considering suicide.

Vignette

Birthday presents in action at my new home: 

My herb garden, from Jordan. 

A panted green shelf from Westy, with a Ball jar vase. 

More to come soon; I'm still rearranging and getting into the swing of things at my new spot! 

Whose house is this?

I've always been ridiculously sentimental about beginnings and ends of things. Lately I've been finding myself admiring the gardens of my neighbors in the Palisades, or pausing outside houses that I'm sure I'll never walk past again to take in their perfect doorways or fences, saying to myself "this is the last time you'll ever see this door knocker, Gwynne, say goodbye."

I feel like the past 3 years have been filled with goodbyes to people and places that I never really intended to leave; drafty apartments in Ithaca, the unremarkable Dallas skyline, and now my picturesque neighborhood in DC with its entirely too perfect wooded trails and sidewalks. I think of Schuyler, how he's plodded along beside me at each locale and waited for me behind dozens of doors. I have to wonder how many more houses we'll adopt together before settling down in a true home. There has been so little permanency to each of my "homes" since I graduated that I feel like I've been living in a perpetual state of not-quite-belonging... I'm not sure what it will take to shake that feeling of displacement.

I guess most things in life are better articulated by a Nobel prize winning writer--

Whose house is this? 

Whose night keeps out the light

In here?

Say, who owns this house?

It's not mine.

I dreamed another, sweeter, brighter

With a view of lakes crossed in painted boats;

Of fields wide as arms open for me.

This house is strange.

Its shadows lie.

Say, tell me, why does its lock fit my key? 

Toni Morrison

Breakfast/Dessert

I'm pretty sure breakfast is my favorite meal of the day. That might be because I eat it when I get to my office, nearly 3 hours after I wake up, so I'm absolutely ravenous (what's new?). Or it could be that I'm just unnaturally obsessed with oatmeal in all its forms, and my various concoctions are always imitations of my favorite desserts including peach melba pie (no words for how good this is, I'm actually eating it as I write this), chocolate raisin spice cake, and of course, carrot cake. I might write a cookbook called "Let's add stuff to oatmeal until it's no longer good for you." Here's what I used for my carrot cake oats:

1/2 cup oat bran and 1 and 3/4 cup water

dash of salt
1 tbsp. chia seeds 

1 heaping tbsp. dark brown sugar

one small carrot, finely grated

vanilla, cinnamon, pumpkin pie spice to taste

ginger pecan granola (sprinkled on top)

dried cranberries 

golden raisins

This is what the end result looked like (sort of; this is a picture of an earlier version that wasn't quite perfect):

Healthy? I think so. Let's not think about the calories. Delicious? YES. Make this, become a believer.

The big L

Because I'm too excited for this weekend to think about anything else.... 

Katie and I thought we were hot back in the day. 

We were. 

I miss those sweatpants, and that sister!

Circa... 1994? 

Haaa Meghan. 

Just dancing to live music at the Stand.  

Standard. 

Mapes girls at the center of the family, as they should be. 

Annual kids pic on the steps!

My running buddy. 

What we think of Rachel's ex boyfriend. 

Perfect. 

Behind the scenes

Most days I like to pretend that all I eat are the yummy meals I put together for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Unfortunately (or fortunately?) it's all a lie. Take a look at what I snacked on before last night's dinner:

Granted, these rice cakes are very low calorie and healthy.

Until you load them up with this:

Whatever, healthy fats, right? (Warning: This stuff is like crack cocaine. If you buy it, you will not stop eating it on absolutely everything until the jar is gone.)

Then, dinner consisted of baked salmon, an obnoxiously huge serving of roasted potatoes, and a plateful of Indian cabbage smothered in cucumber raita sauce-- a normal person would not still be hungry after this meal, trust me. I, however, promptly poured myself a large bowl of cereal and almond milk:

Times two. Damnit!

Then I had the bright idea of chopping up a mango and freezing the pieces to snack on later in the week. Too bad I ate the entire thing straight off the cutting board. Juuust another day!